It started months ago. Actually, more like a couple of years ago but I was in fierce denial. And I noticed it with my phone first. In the morning I would wake up and grab my phone to check my email but everything had a haze about it. I’d rub my eyes and squint to make the blurriness go away which sort of worked for awhile.
But then things got progressively worse. I found myself taking much longer with my blogging because I was making stupid mistakes. I couldn’t see the words on my laptop screen and the blurriness was getting in the way of my work.
And then I was in a foreign country recently and had to rely on a customs official to help me fill out parts of the paperwork I couldn’t see. That was the last straw. It was time to admit that I needed glasses.
And of course I got them which is evident from the picture above.
As my eye doctor was performing the exam, she blamed my declining vision on getting older. This January I will be forty-five. How I got to forty-five so quickly is a mystery to me. It seems like just yesterday that I was sporting parachute pants, LA Gear sneakers and hair with electric blue streaks. I’m an 80’s girl. That’s my excuse.
When I hit forty I sort of had an aging panic attack. I looked for new wrinkles on a daily basis. Bought new bras to push the girls back up to their full and upright position. Invested in creams to slather all over my body. All in a sort of pathetic attempt to stop the inevitable aging process.
So I fully expected to have a breakdown when I put the new glasses on. But you know what? I think they’re kind of hot. I actually like what I see in the mirror lately which my longtime readers know is sort of a miracle.
I think I’m finally getting comfortable in my skin. I’m caring less about what others think and more about how I feel. And I feel really good.
Forty-five is just a few months away, but I’m not dreading it the way I dreaded all of the other forty something birthdays I’ve had so far. And this is a real relief because I was worried that I would get more panicky with each year that passes.
Not only is my vision clearer, but my mind too. I think this growing up thing doesn’t stop when you hit a certain age. Every year, no scratch that, every day brings a new opportunity for growth and change.
And that’s sort of exciting, don’t you think?